I’ve been illustrated and pixelated, man. My roaches have been lovingly depicted in their little boat, rowing through my pad. Yes, man, to celebrate Dorky Day an illustrated edition of The Fan Man is now available for downloading into your very own precious valuable E-reader. The pictures are amazingly authentic, man, with detail down to roach level. You can see dope-smoking pigeons and there’s a beautiful one of the Pope of Junk, with deep religious feelings moving in his heart just before he sells me a worthless yellow school bus.
It’s all there, man, your favorite characters and mine. With just a click of your finger, you can have Uncle Skulky in your attic, and Hawkman, man, climbing through the window of your digital device. How wonderful, man, once again you can read Horse Badorites monologues to your friends in the dorm or nearby jail cell.
And here is proof the universe has responded, man. At the very moment I was being illustrated and pixelated, I heard from the number one Fan Man fan in the world. His name is Ben Koss, and he wins the Purple Dorky award for having one of the illustrations tattooed on his back. It’s the Fan Man playing his moon lute, man.
Now it’s up to you, man, to take action. Go straight to your nearest tattoo artist. Or if you prefer a less painful way of taking The Fan Man to yourself, click on one of the links provided below. For just $4.99 you can have me walk through the rooms of your mind, man, thereby contributing to your complete mental health.